Written by Daz Burns
“If YOU wanted to, YOU would!”
Em’s and I have been out and about doing some awesome workplace mahi throughout the Waikato Region over the last couple of months and some pretty strong themes have been presenting themselves along the way. In a ‘tale as old as time’ fashion, each workplace has their unique character and challenges, but when we really boil things down and ask more questions, we hear “unrelenting stress” “increased workloads” “unclear communication” “in-house conflict”“decreased human resources to cope” etc.
It all boils down to one thing…If we’re honest
And overall, once we get to the crux of the situation… it is “lack of trust.”
It is as simple AND as complicated as that!
It is simple in the fact that it is the most basic fundamental building block of all teams that needs constant nurturing and focus.
It is complicated in the fact that sadly, there are no life hacks that can be offered here and it requires polarising accountability as you have to make a choice to prioritise it, everyday.
Trust is not a “nice to have” addition to a workplace, it is non-negotiable, so if trust in your workplace is fractured, wobbly, conditional or non-existent… there is mahi that must be done.. now!
Trust me when I say, I know that you have a giant to-do list and you have lots of competing priorities, but at the end of the day, putting people first, is a choice you have to make and be accountable for.
I love how Mel Robbins calls this out “if they wanted to, they would.”
And that doesn’t just apply to “them,” it applies to YOU!
“If YOU wanted to, YOU would!”
If you wanted to look up from your computer when someone comes into the office, you would.
If you wanted to find time to spend with a new colleague to support their transition into the team, you would.
If you wanted to have a challenging conversation with a colleague that needs support in some of their professional behaviours, you would.
If you wanted to make a difference in the levels of stress you and your team mates feel, you would.
Right?!
It’s a choice.
“The care you put into things you create matters” (Danel Levitin).
So, no, you won’t find quick fixes, life hacks or magical tinkerbell solutions below to help build trust with your team or your connections, but there are some focus areas we would like to suggest that you start intentionally looking at with the goal to make positive sustainable change for your people.
Build your team in work hours.
To clarify what this means, “team building” isn’t a quarterly trip to the movies together, a social club event or a potluck lunch once a month.
Trust building / team building / laying the foundations … however you want to label it – it needs to be done in your work hours, every single day.
How?
Know your people. Charles Duhigg talks about emotional contagions starting with vulnerability, so aim for conversations with great questions that empower people to kōrero about themselves, their goals, their emotions, their lives outside of mahi.
Working together and collaborating as much as you can, builds trust in the micro-moments.
To add to Seth Godin’s wise words “the future counts on us to make it better” every single day, together.
Deal with things swiftly – don’t avoid friction.
We don’t want to be pushing people along in their journey, in their mahi, in their interactions. We want to constantly be creating an environment of responsibility and accountability that pulls people forward to show up as their best selves, to do their best mahi and to contribute to the trust we are building together.
How?
Have clear standards that everyone is consistently held to.
When a tough conversation needs to be had, have it as soon as possible. Ensure you are mana enhancing in your approach and call people up to be their best.
Give feedback as a gift to help people be their best, not as a sharp prod to embarrass or shame someone.
Don’t complain about things without coming to the table with solutions, without a front footed approach to giving feedback and without an attitude of action – as Dr. Ceri Evans says, “complaining is the great de-energiser. It kills a performance culture” and to add to that, it murders trust!
Get your communication nailed.
Communication, as with all the suggestions here, is a massive piece on its own when we talk about trust. Communication needs to be clear, transparent and efficient. It also needs to have robust processes so that everyone knows who to kōrero with, how to have the kōrero and what is expected in different scenarios.
How?
Be a walking example of what it means to communicate well and to give and receive feedback as gifts.
“Empathy lets us tune into others” (Daniel Goleman and Cary Cherniss) and into ourselves – so remaining self aware when people are communicating is critical in building trust and connecting with others.
Stay curious
Trust relies on you “getting on a path of curiosity” (Dr. Casey Means) and staying on it with a constant future focus on where you want to get to and that is an infinite mission (Simon Sinek).
Get curious about yourself and how you show up.
Get curious about your colleagues, who they are, what they look like when they are thriving and what they need when they face challenges.
Get curious about the environment around you and the part you play in creating it with your energy.
Pay attention to what is changing around you, to what is going on and get curious. Your learning should never ever be considered done – no matter who you are or what position you hold – trust is an infinite game.
How?
Ask great questions about others and of yourself. Always be in learning mode.
Make people feel bigger around you, by sharing your strengths with them and most importantly encouraging them to share their strengths with others. Let them know the unique dent they have made in the world just by being them and strengthening your understanding of them by staying engaged in conversations.
“There is no better way of finding out what someone thinks and feels than simply asking them.” (David Robson)
If not you, then who?
Think of your bank account, and the compound interest that occurs daily with your savings if you keep topping it up, feeding it and not removing any of its value.
It is the same for trust within your team, do everything you can to add to its compounding interest with things like quality interactions and intentional actions; and ensure you aim to never take away from that account.
Trust needs all of us to be engaged in the process, everyday.
It needs action.
It needs intention.
It needs awareness.
It needs egos to be checked at the door.
The proof is in the pudding as they say, which means taking intentional action to move the waka in the right direction is your only option…What can you commit to implementing to build and maintain trust as a team/business in the next twelve months?
If not you, then who?
Workplace Trust Reflection Questions:
“Trust is the stacking and layering of small moments and reciprocal vulnerability over time” (Brené Brown).
As an added extra take away from this kōrero, find a quiet space in your calendar and a quiet space to nest in and really ponder these questions… be transparent and honest with yourself…
- Are you willing to pop your hand up and say if you don’t know something?
- What about if you make a mistake, big or small, are you happy to admit it happened?
- Do you deliver your ‘to’do’s’ when you say you will or do you frequently miss deadlines when others are relying on you?
- Is your behaviour and temperament relatively consistent with all your colleagues?
- Do you listen with curiosity, patience and the intent to genuinely understand the person you are with?
- Are you aware of your contributions in conversations and meetings? Do you feel the need to fill empty spaces in conversations?
- Do you share credit with others for the successes you nail, and do you take responsibility for mistakes with the intent to help yourself and others learn going forward?
- Do you do the right thing, even when no one is watching? (I’m talking gossip, blaming, avoiding responsibility, breaking confidentiality, not following through, taking credit for something you shouldn’t… etc)
I think this list of questions is a bit of a gauntlet that you just ran… and I am guessing it has knocked on the door of self-awareness to call you up to be your best self… so, embrace this new awareness, write down some extra intentions to add to the the question ‘what can you commit to implementing to build and maintain trust as a team/business in the next twelve months?’ and get things moving!
You’ve got this!
Book references:
Charles Duhigg – Super Communicators
Dr. Ceri Evans – Perform Under Pressure
Seth Godin – This is Strategy
Dr. Casey Means – Good Energy
Daniel Levitin- Music as Medicine
David Robson – The Laws of Connection
Optimal – Daniel Goleman and Cary Cherniss
The Infinite Game – Simon Sinek
Dare to Lead – Brené Brown
Date: October – Clear your Friday’s!! 
Time: 9am – 1pm
Location: Kirikiriroa